love is a verb

I am not a friend, I am not a foe
I'm just a piece of fibre ready for your desire
I long for your touch, whenever you are near
When you are gone, I count endless days
I don;t count the stars as I count your ways
I pay no notice to your very greed
I long to be touched because it is like wax
Covering my arms, legs, eyes and ears
It's thick and costly and needing more
Without it I can't be ever here

Don't forget the cost I bear
Sitting here, waiting here,
'Til you were ever near
It is surety and pain
It is suffering and guilt
It is knowing what I had lost
Was the cost of my filth
I have carried it long
I had seen it calloused, bruised
From lifetime of shame
Of my own cross to bear

But the awaking came near like a shot in the dark
My ears can hear, eyes see, what has beheld me?
It is a sun so bright his eyes guide the dark
He showers me with rays of light within it
I can run no more, I can dance no longer
My will is to please thee
You shine your light and ther I see
Glistening in the fire
A heart of gladness
Turned from guilt
To a heart contrite of gold

Place within me a new heart
Show me the path of gladness
Raise in me a heart so soft
You can reach out your hand and touch it
So he reached out his hand and touched my heart
Feeling the workings of its deep disguise
What I trie to conceal he held tight in ties
Then came the thunder then came the rain then came the son itself
Flushing his face in the depths of my heart and breaking its within

The breakage ran deep
The collapse led by sap
And followed by a motion of crack
As I lay before him tossing and turning
Wanting to be set free
The cords and the nerves began to depart
The sounds of the cracking bit by bit
And  out came the blackened hardened
Out came the sap guiltridden and dripped
By the moistness from his lips

Not a drop of blood not a fountain of pain
Was left once his hands put it together again
He broke my heart and he tore me apart
That I might live again
As he brought the two pieces together again
The world of my body shook
Until the particles with cords and flesh
Were breathing as whole as its birth